She's a lunchbag stowaway!

Noon at work: a moment of sustenance and solitude, a time to satisfy a late-morning/early afternoon case of the munchies, a moment between a person and their lunch. Well no more... SD, as you can see has ruined everything. All of which she turns to ka-ka in the moment it takes to open the velcro opening to that bag. Now I'm stuck the entire day, in my office, a petrified, ghastly vengeful choir doll standing on my desk, greeting every visitor with her look of frozen terror. I'm staying behind locked doors until quitting time.

She's a basket case!

I was sitting with Spinnerina, lingering over coffee, surrounded by festive lights, wondering where Scary Doll may have crept off. She could be anywhere, I thought! "She likes to hide in plain sight," suggested Spinnerina. A single second passed before the beast appeared. Her astonished expression and beady eyes shoved into the catchall reading basket!

She's nestled in the dog food!

As I was in the garage, searching the boxes of holiday whimsy, I could hear the tiny sounds of a struggle.  What should I stumble upon but SD laying among the cans of Wilderness brand dog food! The Salmon and Chicken grill proved too delightful to a starved SD after spending days trapped in the garage. Funny how far desperation will take you. However, I hear that Wilderness is grain-free. SD wants to cut her gluten and she's been talking about making her own gravy! Sadly, she was unable to get her tiny wooden hands around the metal peel-off tab on the cans. I hate to break it to her that we had fresh potatoes nearby. Silly freakish holiday dolly!

She's getting dressed for work!

There I was, just wandering by in a nude sort of way to pick out Monday's outfit and BAM! Scary Doll in my face.  And she saw my particulars...which may explain the stunned expression. I don't know if I will survive another season of this.  

She's going to work!

The travel bug had struck Scary Doll to the point where she's constantly looking for ways to explore the world. I was loading my LL Bean backpack with my work laptop and other essentials, when I found it very difficult to put my glasses case into the front compartment. The obstruction was revealed to be Scary Doll. Again, she either has a hankering for travel, or she has somekind of odd sexual fixation with tight spaces. I wonder if this has something to do with low blood sugar. Only she can decide...

She's in my hotel nightstand!

Scary Doll went right to work, on day 1 of the Minnesota trip, by hiding among my socks and underwear. Wait until she visits my mom's house. She'll have the run of the house!

She's learning how to live life as an egg!

Well, apparently, Scary Doll's experimentation into Islam was short-lived, leading her to resume her normal holiday lurking tradition. I searched high and low, but then I remembered Liisa's hint that Scary Doll shed the burqa and headed to colder climates to escape the yoke of oppression. This really scrambled my brain. Sure enough, I found her trying to emulate the life of the egg by jamming herself into one of our plastic reusable egg containers.

More relatives!

At our staff holiday luncheon last week, the table was decorated with these monstrosities.  I was snapping pictures left and right.  My table-mate, an octogenarian substitute teacher, asked if I'd like to gather all (17) of them together for a picture, and aren't they cute?  She obviously had no idea of how I was feeling about this discovery.

She's frolicking with the cleaning supplies!

Scary Doll was hovering above on the door-mounted cleaning supplies caddy on the laundry room door ready to shock me with her presence and her knowledge of cleaning supplies.

She's in with the corks!!

I was just minding my business, reading and drinking some nog. Suddenly I gasped to discover the above. My bowl of corks is polluted!!!

She's in our Brita container!!!!

Imagine my shock and terror! Oh the frozen face of death gaze upon me! In an effort to fill the Brita dispenser with water, I routinely lifted the cover only to gaze upon the terrifying wooden visage of Scary Doll! I'm not sure if she's interested in water filtration systems or interested in the calming effects of cramped spaces and the theories of Temple Grandin. But this genuinely creeped me out. Makes me wonder where her  inquisitive nature will take her next...

She's back and she's pissed off.

She's pretending to be Joan of Arc!!!

So we were sitting home after a long day when Spinning Girl asks me in her little voice, "do you wanna make a fire?" I thought that sounded like a nice idea, so I got up from the couch and headed to the garage for an ambiance log (aka, Duraflame^® Crackle Log). At the time, the fireplace glass window was closed but I could vaguely see a haunting silhouette. I was frightened and shivering as I slowly opened the glass door to discover that Scary Doll was the haunting image, certainly not any less scary. We were wondering why she would consider anything involving immolation. Drunk Santa was calling her a witch earlier (or maybe I heard that wrong). She was hinting earlier that she wanted to actually produce and direct Joan of Arc the Musical for Broadway or Off-Broadway or Off-Off-Broadway. I'm not sure where she's going to get the financing.

She's in my shoe!!!

Scary Doll decided that she envies the normal person's ability to wear shoes. This makes particular sense since her wire legs intersect with a wooden block. I personally think this is overkill.